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Betrayed By Her Own Heart
Sarah Spalding has learned to forge her own way and never to trust anyone—least of all a Yankee. But when her companion abandons her while on a train to Colorado, Sarah begrudgingly accepts the help of Whitman Kendrick—a Yankee, yes, but one with the most bewitching green eyes. Allowing Whit to be her traveling escort is one thing, taking him as a lover is another—even though she’s tempted beyond reason…
Whit Kendrick isn’t quite sure what to make of the sharp-tongued, sassy woman sharing his train compartment. All he knows is that Sarah is refreshingly different from most women—and his urgent, primal attraction for her is unlike any he’s experienced. Breaking down Sarah’s wall of defense won’t be easy. But Whit is determined to prove to Sarah that they’re more alike than different—and loving each other is all they need…
“Williamson spins a fast-paced story…that intrigues as it titillates.”
—Romantic Times on The Education of Madeline
Chapter One
September 1875, Appleton, Virginia
Sarah Spalding stood with her back to the room as the conversation
went on behind her. At the bay window, she
stared out into the blackness of the night, looking for an answer,
yet it wasn’t forthcoming. Her friends were arguing
about whether or not she should close the boardinghouse
while she was gone. As if she wasn’t going to come back, a
fact they couldn’t yet know.
After ten minutes of listening to the bickering, she turned
around. They all stopped and watched as she lit a cigarette,
then took a puff.
“Well, aren’t you going to say anything?” Vickie, her oldest
friend and voice of her conscience, stood by the fireplace with
a glass of whiskey in her hand.
Sarah looked around at her friends and tried to memorize
their faces. Vickie was a curvy, vivacious blonde with a big
laugh and a bigger heart. Red and Doreen were the original
boarders and considered Sarah their older sister and good
friend. The three women meant more to her than any family
she’d ever been fortunate or unfortunate to call her own.
Their loyalty was unwavering and consistent.
Lorenzo was the all-around guard at the boardinghouse, an
Italian immigrant she’d found when he was a thirteen-yearold
orphan eating scraps in an alley. At twenty, he was a
handsome man. Unfortunately he’d decided Sarah was the
woman for him, although she was too old for him. He’d had
a constant melancholy expression on his face since she’d announced
her intention to travel to Colorado to be reunited
with her brother.
Micah.
She hadn’t seen her brother in so long, more than ten years.
Not since she’d stitched up the wound in his face and he’d disappeared
from her life. Micah had been a battered soldier
with more ghosts in his eyes than she could count. His actions
that day had added a few more.
Now it seemed he’d settled in the wilds of Colorado and
was getting married in less than a month’s time. His intended
bride, Elizabeth, had wired her with an invitation to the wedding,
as a surprise for Micah. Now all Sarah had to do was
figure out how to say good-bye to her friends and get on the
train in the morning.
Neither one would be easy.
“What do you want me to say? It takes weeks to get to Colorado.
Then I’m sure I’ll want to stay and visit with my
brother. I have no idea when I’ll be back.” Sarah must’ve lied
convincingly enough because they all looked like they believed
her.
What she hadn’t told them was she had no intention of
coming back, ever. Sarah’s Boardinghouse was closing for
good. It had been her anchor in a sea of tumult and uncertainty
for many years, but the time had come for it to close.
Coward that she was, she couldn’t tell her friends that she
planned on staying in Colorado, away from the blood-soaked
ground of Virginia, away from the nightmares that kept her
from a full night’s sleep in more than ten years.
Sarah pressed a fist against her stomach. She couldn’t remember
a time when her stomach hadn’t been tied in knots.
Time and circumstances hadn’t changed much, not enough to
untie the Gordian knot she carried like a babe within her. It
had become a part of her to the point where if she woke up
one morning and it was gone, she would feel a loss.
“I told you girls you can live here, but the rest of the women
have to go. This is no longer a boardinghouse.”
Red snickered, one titian curl bouncing against her alabaster
cheek.
Sarah scowled at her, cutting off the young woman’s mirth.
“Just because I let you do whatever business you want in your
bed doesn’t make me anything but a boardinghouse owner.
I’ve never taken a cent from any of you except rent money.”
“What about me?” Lorenzo’s deep voice had the lilt of his
Italian upbringing, muted but still there.
“I’m sure the girls will need someone to keep up the house
if they decide to stay. You can sleep in your room in the carriage
house, as always.” Sarah couldn’t turn him out. She
couldn’t turn any of her friends out. This decision was hers to
make, but she wanted to make their suffering as brief as possible.
“Look, all of you, the only thing that changes are the
women who come and go from here. You can live in this
house as long as you like. Considering I don’t know when I’ll
be back, it’s just closing the door for anyone else but you.
Lorenzo will still be here to protect you.”
Vickie came over and tried to throw her arm around
Sarah’s shoulder, but there was an eight-inch difference in
height and Vickie ended up just putting her hand on Sarah’s
arm instead.
“You’re too damn tall, Sarah,” she grumbled as she pushed
her heavy blond curls back. “We’re not worried about the
boardinghouse. The rest of them girls can go to hell and find
themselves another bed to lie in. We’re worried about you.”
Sarah couldn’t have been more surprised. “Me? Why are
you worried about me?” She fingered the knife in her sleeve,
its worn grip comforting. “I can take care of myself.”
“You hired that bitch Mavis Ledbetter to be your companion,
instead of asking one of us to go.” Vickie ticked off on
her fingers as she added, “You’re closing the boardinghouse.
You’ve packed everything you own, including those old books
of your daddy’s. And you’ve been moping around here for a
week since you got that goddamn telegram.”
Sarah swallowed, realizing they knew she wasn’t coming
back. “What are you saying, Vic?”
“She’s saying we know you’re leaving for good.” Doreen,
the youngest of the crew at twenty-two, had the looks of a
doll with tight brown curls, a curvaceous little figure, and
brown eyes with the longest lashes known to man.
“What makes you say that?”
“You brought life back into us. You saved us and you think
we’re going to let you leave without being honest?” Red
stood, her gaze hopeful. “Will you let us come with you?”
Sarah hadn’t expected it and the question hit her with the
force of a horse kick. They wanted to go with her? She was
trying to close a chapter in her life that needed closing, yet the
most treasured pages were trying to slip into her pocket for
her new journey. Impossible.
“First of all, none of you have money to buy a train ticket
all the way to Colorado. Second, there’s no reason for any of
you to change your lives for me. I love you all, but the answer
is no.” Sarah prided herself on being able to tell the hard
truths, even if her stupid heart prevented her from doing so
on occasion.
Of all of them, Vickie looked the most hurt. She pulled her
hand away from Sarah’s arm and stepped back. Her lips were
pressed together so tightly, they were white. “You’re leaving
us behind on purpose.”
Sarah shook her head. “No, I’m leaving me behind.”
“What the hell does that mean?” Vickie picked up her glass
from the table behind the sofa and slung back the rest of the
amber liquid like a seasoned drinker.
“I don’t know if I can explain it.” Sarah shook her head
again. “Just know that I’m not leaving any of you behind.
You’ll always be part of who I am. But I want to start again—
can you understand that?”
Deep in Vickie’s gaze, Sarah saw the truth. She understood,
but that didn’t mean her friend was any less hurt.
“If it was anyone but family, I might have to stop you from
going.” Vickie’s voice had become huskier. “You’re breaking
my heart, Sarah.” She held up one hand and walked from the
room, her head held high.
The other two girls followed, leaving Sarah alone with
Lorenzo. The naked longing in his gaze made her throat close
up. He was such a boy regardless of his age. Lorenzo hadn’t
been exposed to the very worst life could offer, but Sarah had
cut her teeth on it.
“I will go with you, to protect you.” He offered a tremulous
smile.
Sarah shook her head. “I’m sorry, but the answer is still no.
The girls need you, and will need you more when I’m not
here. Take care of them, please.”
He nodded, then left the room with one last mournful look.
Sarah swallowed the curse that threatened to appear as she
realized it would be her last evening at the boardinghouse.
She was going to start over again, a clean slate in a new place
where no one knew her or her past. Perhaps the opportunities
there would be more plentiful than in a state still recovering
from the ravages of war.
Sarah might have prayed for good fortune on her journey
and destination, but she’d long since given up on the practice.
She made her own luck and her own way in life.
The road to Colorado waited for her.
In the soft lamplight of her room, Sarah packed the last of
her things into her traveling bag. It wasn’t much, truth be
told. She had lived simply for so long that possessions had become
few and far between. The only indulgence was her father’s
books. She’d hidden them from the Yankees and the
bastards after the war who thought the house was theirs for
the taking.
One of her fondest and faintest memories was of him reading
to her. He had a knack for becoming the characters as he
read, keeping young Sarah enthralled. Yet he died right as the
war began, leaving her and her mother to fend for themselves
in a cruel, hostile world. The books reminded her of a different
time, a different life.
As she packed, a wave of melancholy washed over her.
Sarah was leaving behind the house she grew up in, learned
in, survived in and became a cynical nearly thirty-year-old
woman in.
It was past time to move on, and she knew it.
“All packed up?”
Vickie’s voice didn’t surprise Sarah. She turned to her friend
and managed a small smile.
“More than you know.” She sat and patted the bed.
Sarah could tell Vickie was still hurt about her leaving, but
there was nothing Sarah could or would change. Done was
done and the time had come for her to leave.
“Do you remember when I caught you stealing?” Sarah
could picture Vickie eleven years earlier, a little sprite with
barely a curve on her thirteen-year-old body.
“I wasn’t stealing.” Vickie cleared her throat. “I was hungry,
so I was only taking food to fill my belly.” She looked as
though she almost believed it.
Sarah burst out laughing the same time Vickie did. The
friends shared a moment of mirth before the mood reverted
back to one of sad endings.
“Of all the people in my life, I will miss you the most.” It
wasn’t easy for Sarah to be emotional, even for her best
friend. “You and I, we survived together. There isn’t a person
in the world I am closer to than you. The good thing is, you
are a survivor and life goes on. Perhaps with me leaving you
can find your own path instead of trailing along by my side
getting caught up in my battles.”
Full of too many emotions and in need of surcease from all
the drama, Sarah squeezed Vickie’s hand. “Now let’s get these
bags downstairs and have a drink.”
Vickie looked at Sarah with so much sadness and even a
hint of betrayal in her blue eyes. “I can’t imagine living here
without you, Sarah.”
Sarah waved her hand in dismissal. “You are the toughest
person I know. Don’t get all sappy on me now. The sun will
rise and you will still be alive and kicking.” She wasn’t about
to accept her friend’s emotional well-being into her keeping.
“I know you don’t like to talk about feelings and such, but
I have to say this and then I’ll stop, I promise.” Vickie took a
deep breath, the fabric of her blue dress straining against her
ample endowments. “You saved my life twice. First when I
was a child, hungry, scared, and confused. Then when I was
on the edge of leaving life altogether. For that, I will always be
grateful. Aside from that, you are my best friend, the one person
I can tell my secrets to, and you were going to walk out of
my life without saying good-bye. That hurt, a lot, and while I
understand it, it’s going to take me time to forgive it.”
Vickie knew exactly what to say to make Sarah regret her
actions, as she damn sure did right then. The opportunity to
start fresh had presented itself, and Sarah had jumped at the
chance, regardless of anyone or anything else. Hurting Vickie
had not been part of her thought process, but apparently
she’d done more than hurt her—she’d damaged their friendship.
Sarah cleared the lump that had taken up residence in her
throat. “I’m sorry, Vic.”
Vickie nodded, her blond curls bouncing gently with the
movement. “I know you are, but you are still leaving, aren’t
you?”
“Yes. There’s nothing in the world going to keep me in Virginia.
I need to clean my own slate and write the story I was
meant to live.” Sarah picked up her traveling case and the
small bag containing the books. “I didn’t mean to hurt you,
but my mind’s made up. You coming for that drink or not?”
Uncomfortable with the conversation, Sarah waited while
emotions flitted across Vickie’s face. She finally rose and took
the small bag from Sarah’s hand. “I wouldn’t miss it for the
world.”
For the first time in many, many years, Sarah felt the sting
of tears. She blinked them away and blew out the lamp.
In the wee hours of the night, Sarah returned to her room,
the whiskey washing through her veins like an old friend. She
hadn’t intended on having more than one drink, but once
they’d gotten started, it was difficult to stop.
She’d miss Vickie, and telling her dear friend that had been
too difficult to do. Instead she’d kept drinking until her vision
had started to blur. Sarah had managed to say good night and
give Vickie a very brief hug, and then she’d stumbled off to
her room.
What was wrong with her? She just couldn’t seem to allow
anyone to know she had a heart. A cold bitch is what everyone
saw.
Sarah slid off her clothes and climbed into bed nude only to
realize she wasn’t alone. A body lay next to her, a hot, hard
body. She should’ve been afraid, but it wasn’t the first time
Lorenzo had snuck into her room.
“Cara mia, I’m sorry, I just had to try one more time.” His
accent deepened as he skimmed his hand up her leg.
She stopped him before he reached anything important.
“I’ve told you before, I don’t have sex with my employees. Go
back to your own bed.”
“Ah, but I don’t work for you anymore.”
Sarah could almost hear him smile in the darkness. Dammit,
he was right, of course. She’d given her business interest to
her friends, signing away the house and business she’d held on
to for so long.
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